Every Wall Has a Door

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Photo by Peter Hershey on Unsplash
I'm on the phone with a very dear friend.  They are struggling with one very fundamental life question.  "Am I fulfilling my life purpose?"  This person is despondent and talking about giving up on life, thinking they had wasted so much of their life and it seemed to them futile to carry on.  My heart is aching listening to this conversation.

How will it be possible to say anything that would make a difference?  What coaching would be possible?  What popped into my mind was something Dr. Wayne Dyer said.  "Look at every person as the unfolding of God."   This question burned to be asked, "When did you decide to give up on yourself?"  The answer "When I was seventeen I made a very stupid decision and since then I have wasted so much time.  Now I'm in my fifties.  What a waste."

I responded with "You did something when you were seventeen that was the right thing for you given where you were, the circumstances you were in, and the tools you had.  Nothing can change that, so when are you going to stop going back to that moment trying to fix it?"  The silence was palpable.  I could hear my friend sobbing.  After a moment I heard a whispered "I have never heard that before, and it makes so much sense."

When you hit a wall stop for a moment. Look at the stories you've made up about yourself. Have compassion for your young self. Look for the crack of light that comes from under the door. Freedom is waiting.

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